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Don't date or marry an abusive person.
An abusive boyfriend or abusive husband in the early days becomes an abusive boyfriend or abusive husband in the later days. The most important risk factors for the abusive perpetrator's murder of their partner are estrangement and previous assaulting and controlling behavior. Failure to control outcomes may play a role in abusive behavior.
Suicide Narrative
What I write below has little if anything to do with cleaning. I write it for the sake of personal gratification. Maybe someone else will find something of value here. I will start a page on these subjects. I try to clarify the suicide act so that I can understand it better, not that I really will understand it.
A suicide cleanup narrative written in English by a native English speaker must confess to a narrow perspective. What I write here cannot begin to unravel suicide issues in Japan, other than calling death in combat for the motherland "altruism."
To begin, suicide by Asians, to generalize, usually occurs by hanging. Poverty, shame, guilt, and loneliness (alienation) should fulfill the more obvious motivators. Like so many other countries, crime scene cleanup has yet to become a business.
Hanging also qualifies as the preferred method of suicide in European countries among white males. In fact, white males worldwide commit suicide at a much higher rate than any other demographic group.
I should add that third world countries do not have the tracking means or methods that the industrialized nations share. I'm generalizing of course. Our statistics indicate handguns are the weapon of choice in most Arkansas suicide acts
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Emile Durkheim's seminal work, "Suicide," brought empiricism to new heights in the industrialized nations. To expect colonialists in third world nations to measure suicide among natives misses the entire point of colonialism, resource accumulation for the greater glory of God as the "white man's burden." To this day many African countries have problems feeding their populations.
Many might die by suicide, it seems; in the United States, I've cleanup suicides for white guys who bowed out for as little as a bent fender, according to their neighbors; there's always more though, but not starvation, not in these United States. We might suppose the number of suicides among the starving and disease-ridden to reach horrific numbers.
I'm reminded of my sociology and psychology professors warning against generalizing our social sciences to the third world. Even more ludicrous, the application of "humanist psychology" models to the third world makes about as much sense as sending Christmas trees to a starving nation. How could they, would they afford crime scene cleanup, even by me, Eddie Evans?
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Preventing Suicide
So what I write about here belongs to the United States, its various demographic, ethnic, social, and cultural groups.
When we speak of "preventing suicide" in the US, we need to clarify the big question: Should I ask him/her if she/he is thinking about suicide? My blog and crime scene cleanup school also has material related to suicide cleanup.
We might phrase it, "What's on your mind?". "You've been noticeably different and I hear you saying things that worry me." Whatever it takes to get this issue out in the open, do it. If the subject does indeed contemplate suicide, nobody will stop them once their goal has become part of their big plan.
Still, we never know when intervention will change their plans. The truth about suicide is that counseling seldom works as well as environmental changes. To change behavior and attitude, change environment. Be that as it may, ensure that a Arkansas suicide prevention telephone number becomes available, in any case.
Look at these venerable seven risk factors for suicide by alcoholics (Murphy' 1992 research, quoted in COMPREHENSIVE TEXTBOOK OF SUICIDOLOOGY, Ronald W. Maris, Alan L. Berfman, Morton M. Silverman, page 370)
At risk alcoholics drink heavily (a form of suicide itself), may have a major depressive disorder, little or no social support (one of seven types of alienation), unemployment (definitely a strong motivator in a strong work ethic person), living alone (elderly), suicidal thoughts or communication, and serious medical illness. Seek help for Arkansas residents fitting this profile if appropriate.
So many of these indicators point to older white men that we should expect their numbers to reflect the highest incidence of suicide, and they do. We would expect loneliness, hopelessness, and poor health as motivators for suicide in this population. Alcohol and drug abuse play a lesser role, although depression may operate as a motivator.
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What I find important in Murphy's study stands out pointedly. Murphy's research showed that underlying psychiatric disorders coincided with alcoholic suicides. I would expect psychiatric disorders to operate as suicide motivators in younger, demographic populations than older suicide victims.
In two different studies of alcoholic suicides using his risk factors, Murphy came up with 69% and 76% positives when the dust settled. These figures show significance for anyone involved in the study of suicide and alcoholism.
Remove the depressive disorder and the self-medicating may come under control with fewer alcohol and drug related suicides. Ensure that a telephone number to the nearest Arkansas Alcoholics Anonymous remains available.
It happens that the alcohol and other substance abusers self-medicate to place a handle on their depressive disorder. From society's perspective, these alcoholics are "drunks," not sick. When these alcoholics live a "depressive lifestyle" we find a strong trigger for their alcohol and drug abuse, and suicide for some.
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In other places I write about white males, The Six Gun Mystique, and suicide. From the perspective of non-whites, white male suicide must seem perverse. G.K. Chesterson attacked suicide as the sin of sins because the "man who kills himself kills all." It's the same anywhere, including Arkansas for Chesterson.
Suicide wipes out the world and in so doing insults all of life's beauty. Chesterson notes that at least the thief lives satisfied with diamonds, complimenting the diamonds and their source. The suicide victim exits the world insulting it and everything else.
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Don't date or marry an abusive person.
Outcome Control
Why abusive behavior? Failure to control outcomes may lead to abusive behavior.
Abusive people lose self-control because they fail to consider their misplaced rage and anger; others become targets of their externalized emotional turmoil. Physical abuse becomes the outcome of their failure to focus on pertinent information for better behavior outcomes.
The failure to control outcomes finds others as the cause and then target of externalized frustration and rage. "Every time you do that you make me mad!" means frustrated actors punish others to displace their own failure to control outcomes. In short, frustration experienced through negative outcomes becomes externalized rage as abusive behavior.
Imagine the desperation experienced by toddlers as they fail to please their parents, their care-givers. A generalized feeling of dread envelopes their attitude toward new experiences and ideas. Parents with poor parenting skills soon destroy the toddler's quest for self-actualization, learning to learn, and an assertive, non-aggressive place in the world.
In the United States schools routinely promote "failing" students. As a consequence failing behavior becomes a rewarding behavior in an ironic twist. Failing behavior becomes a means of controlling outcomes. "Why try?" becomes an attitude toward learning new behavior and ideas because there's no risk of frustration and chastisement.
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Looking back to hunting-and-gathering societies, life may have had more external dangers and little material wealth, but controlling an individual's outcomes for thought and practice remained within the reach of most actors.
Simple technology and simple customs allowed most actors to control the outcomes of their thoughts and practice. Most people would find plenty to reward their efforts without frustration. Rage and frustration existed, and we must imagine some sense of control over outcomes existed. Where such control failed, sympathetic magic would arise in response to perceived powerlessness.
Time and conditions change. In hunting-and-gathering societies outcome control remained in reach, but behaviors similar to today's stealing, lying, cheating, and abusive behavior existed. At the forefront of their emergence, these conscious behaviors probably began through deception.
Women and children learned to hide surplus food from dominant males, deceiving their patriarchal leadership for simple survival. If the reader prefers, Adam and Eve deceived one another and begot Cain, the masterful agrarian deceiver of his parents and herding brother, the first homicide victim.
Lies, counter lies, deception, and homicide remain part of the human condition. Rage and abusive control, as in the beginning, remain part of the human condition. Where outcome control fails early in life, early frustration and rage become filtration mechanisms, selectively filtering socialization for no good. A barrier to ridding society of barbarism grows with abused toddlers and others.
At least today the Arkansas police know to take someone to jail following a domestic violence incident.
Eddie Evans
Crime Scene Cleanup
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